Dreams do come true
by K10
Summary: Daria struggles with thoughts of Homosexuality and Suicide. There is an explination for the title.


Dreams do come true  
  
By ~K~  
  
{This story contains certain concepts that some people may not be able to deal with. Homosexuality, Death, and Suicide. If you continue to read this, remember that I warned you.}  
  
{I do not own Daria}  
  
It all started last year. Jane and I became friends the year before. We could talk about anything. I felt so close to her. Not only because she and I shared the same belief that the world sucks, but for a stronger reason. We had the power to read each other's mind. No not the way you think. We could feel each other's feelings. We could tell what the other was thinking, and what the other would do next. Before I met her, I felt alone in this world. I felt that no one understood me. I was a lonely ant in a world of anteaters. I wasn't pretty, or popular, or self centered. It was hard to live the way I did surrounded by people, like my sister Quinn. Until one day, I found another lonely ant. And together no one could stop us. I didn't think I'd ever feel lonely again, not until a while ago. I noticed something about myself. I had feelings for Jane. Not just friendly feelings, but real romantic feelings. It scared me. I always knew I was different. Deep down I find that I always knew I was this way. But I never thought about it. It doesn't bother me that I'm a lesbian. What bothers me is that I'm in love with my best friend. If this was someone else I might have acted on these feelings, but I didn't want to ruin our friendship. It occurred to me that if I was feeling these feelings then Jane would eventually figure it out. That's why I pushed away from her. I didn't want to hurt our friendship. I wouldn't ruin a friendship like ours for anything. Not even for love. But while trying to save our relationship, I made it worse. Jane thought I was pushing away from her. She didn't take it well. I wanted to explain, but that would just bring everything out into the open. Jane still called me once in a while, and we still went out for pizza after school, but our friendship was severely weakened. I thought of just telling her. If I told her I pushed away because I was in love with her, many things could happen. She could accept it, she could hate me, and our friendship would be ripped in two, or maybe she would feel the same for me. But I pushed that idea out of my head. Of course she didn't like me like that. Girls weren't her type. She dated many guys, but never said anything about women. I thought about telling her. But I couldn't, every time I started saying something, I would chicken out and pull away even more. I've been depressed for a while now. Almost a year. I can't go on like this any more. She was my reason to live, but in my bought of stupidity I couldn't ask her for help. I know I should've talked to someone. Maybe I could have talked to Aunt Amy, or went to a counselor or something. But it was too late now. I made up my mind. I could see the empty bottle in my hand. My vision was blurring and I felt dizzy, and sleepy. I couldn't move. All I could do was lay there, on my bed. I didn't believe in God, or heaven. As I sat there, feeling my heart slow, I thought about where I would go. If I didn't believe in Heaven, I couldn't very well go there. I decided that I would just disappear. With no blood pumping to my brain, I would be dead. My body staying on earth, but my mind disappearing. I wouldn't go anywhere. Not to mother nature, not to the Heavens, not anywhere. When you're dead, you're dead, and that's it. As my heart slowed further, all I could think about was Jane. I thought maybe I should've just told her. Now I wanted to tell her. I wanted to hold her, and kiss her, but none of that could ever happen now. I made a decision, maybe the right one, maybe the wrong one. But it was made, and I must go through with it. I couldn't concentrate any further. I couldn't feel my body anymore. It wasn't like a numb feeling, it was no feeling. I felt as if I were just a head, with no body. Then my last breath, and my last heartbeat, and I was gone. Gone forever, only staying in the memory of loved ones, but those won't last forever. I was gone.  
  
{About the title. Daria should have talked to Jane about her feelings. But she didn't talk to Jane(or anyone) about her problem. She just goes and commits suicide without getting help. If she did talk to Jane, she would of at least find out if commiting suicide was such a good idea. For example; If Daria talks to Jane, and Jane shares the same feelings, then Daria's 'dream' That she and Jane will be together will come true. But since Daria didn't talk to Jane, she never found out if Jane liked her or not. She didn't know that 'Dreams sometimes do come true', so you shouldn't give up on them. [Now do you see the moral of the story?]}  
  
I thought I should clarify that, since my first explanation wasn't very clear. I hope THIS explanation is better. ( 


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